I'm sorry that I started this blog in a time like this. English is not my mother tongue but I'll try to explain the best I can.
Some days ago I decided to partially leave lolita. I sold most of my wardrobe.
This is the huge EMS box where evrything I sold is kept now. My closet is almost empty.
I had the feeling lolita put so much pressure on me. I couldn't go shopping without lookin for loliable stuff which ended in not buying anything that wasn't loliable. I started not buying stuff that hat chemical lace, underwear for example. I felt owning brand was a competition. Who has more, who spends more, who gets the best deals. It took me a lot of time to be "good" in all those things and I considered lolita the most important thing in my life.
While I thought this would make me happy, it was not. I was dissatisfied because I never had enough. I spent all my money on brand but ended up not having enough money for regular clothes.
I know so many print names, standart size measurements, how ordering for several brands and online shops oes, washing devices, release years and so on. I put so much time in what I thought made a "good" lolita.
Fuck it. I love lolita but it turned to a selfmade nightmare to me. I didn't like wearing lolita anymore. Since I couldn't justify owning several thousand's euros worth of clothes I sold the majority. All I'm keeping are three AatP skirts, a Miho Matsuda and a Moitie one, my romper and OP, a couple of blouses, all my blazers, cardigangs and socks. I'll buy two pairs of boots and Silent Moon from the money I got from my sales and will get myself a proper winter coat in black. And that'll be it. I am a normal person with a delicate little lolita wardrobe and a lot of free time from now on. I'll have stuff left for three different gothic coords, a pirate coord, a classic coord and a sailor coord. All I need and all I want. I bought a lot of 80's styled clothes this week and spent around 250€ on them. I even bought some books and shoes. None of them are loliable and I love it.
(I won't stop this blog. I still wear lolita. I still check for updates and everything. I will just be a whole lot less obsessed ;D)
