I'm sorry that I started this blog in a time like this. English is not my mother tongue but I'll try to explain the best I can.
Some days ago I decided to partially leave lolita. I sold most of my wardrobe.
This is the huge EMS box where evrything I sold is kept now. My closet is almost empty.
I had the feeling lolita put so much pressure on me. I couldn't go shopping without lookin for loliable stuff which ended in not buying anything that wasn't loliable. I started not buying stuff that hat chemical lace, underwear for example. I felt owning brand was a competition. Who has more, who spends more, who gets the best deals. It took me a lot of time to be "good" in all those things and I considered lolita the most important thing in my life.
While I thought this would make me happy, it was not. I was dissatisfied because I never had enough. I spent all my money on brand but ended up not having enough money for regular clothes.
I know so many print names, standart size measurements, how ordering for several brands and online shops oes, washing devices, release years and so on. I put so much time in what I thought made a "good" lolita.
Fuck it. I love lolita but it turned to a selfmade nightmare to me. I didn't like wearing lolita anymore. Since I couldn't justify owning several thousand's euros worth of clothes I sold the majority. All I'm keeping are three AatP skirts, a Miho Matsuda and a Moitie one, my romper and OP, a couple of blouses, all my blazers, cardigangs and socks. I'll buy two pairs of boots and Silent Moon from the money I got from my sales and will get myself a proper winter coat in black. And that'll be it. I am a normal person with a delicate little lolita wardrobe and a lot of free time from now on. I'll have stuff left for three different gothic coords, a pirate coord, a classic coord and a sailor coord. All I need and all I want. I bought a lot of 80's styled clothes this week and spent around 250€ on them. I even bought some books and shoes. None of them are loliable and I love it.
(I won't stop this blog. I still wear lolita. I still check for updates and everything. I will just be a whole lot less obsessed ;D)
Sorry to hear that you were under pressure with Lolita fashion. I agree with you about everything you've mentioned - sometimes it can seem like a competition to own lots of brand and have perfect, enviable coordinates.
AntwortenLöschenI know what you mean, and I agree with you.
AntwortenLöschenI'm glad you won't stop wearing lolita. But it's also good to spend money on other things, and not just lolita. I think you did the right thing.
I think you feel that way because of how perfect you always look too, i think you might be feeling the pressure to keep on looking as perfect and producing as amazing photos every single time? Plus that leads to not wanting to make photos in the same outfit which leads to shopping more and more.
AntwortenLöschenI used to feel that way but i only post in my blog now and since i started feeling less will to post on the int online comms its been a lot better this last year or so.
I don't buy less because of that and my closet kind of grows from time to time (and its already big so i should stop or sell) but its not about wanting to step it up anymore, its just wanting more pretty clothes, like people who keep buying whatever hobby their in? (cds, lipsticks, stationary, books, whatever).
But if in your case it was as you say then I agree with you and i think the change was a good thing even if you had to break out of some lolita items to do so.
When i shop for clothes that are not lolita i don't go for loliable at all, i'm very much into deconstructed and stylish simple lines. I've never been very girly-girl. But going for loliable things in the start was a problem indeed so i totally understand what you mean.
We are not friends but i have this feeling in my heart and i'm going to put it in words regardless of wether it sounds odd or not: I feel very proud of you and I hope it all works out for you very soon.
Love,
J
It's a shame how this fashion can put so much pressure on a person.
AntwortenLöschenBut I hope and believe that you'll find a way to wear lolita next to "normal" clothes in a more relaxing way. In the end it has to be about what's best for you, don't forget that ^^